November 27th, 2012

Harriet Vane

An idea whose time has come

"Duchess," said the Admiral (to get my attention).  "What?" "Do you realize that $282 million worth of turkey is thrown away within a day or so after Thanksgiving?" "Well, then," said I in reply, "The thing to do is rename Thanksgiving  the Great Yearly Slaughter of the Turkeys."

"Consider (I continued) how people breed super-fat turkeys all year in order to kill them so they can sell them to people who will feel bad if they don't have a turkey.  We don't even know if those turkeys had a decent existence over the year, do we?"

Tottering about, too fat to cross the road.

Organic turkeys, now, maybe not so shot up with chemicals, but let's face it, tasteless. Tasteless birds.

I know we could make casseroles with turkey. When the Admiral and I were young and broke, I'd make a casserole of the left-overs and we'd ingest turkey for two weeks afterwards.

But would it not be better to have Tuna Salad day. Then we could all give thanks for the invention of mayonnaise. I do not propose Chicken Day lest the growers re-design chickens. (People, especially capitalist farmers, control the evolution of animals and plants.)

The turkey became central when people really had big stable families. Most of us no longer do.